Philippians 4:8-9

8 Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. 9 Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.

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This is the new scripture that keeps popping up in my life. So, to follow suit of so many who do "Thankful Thursday", here's my list of things I'm SO grateful for...

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~Loving family

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~Supportive friends

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~An awesome church home/church family

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~A job I truly enjoy

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~Great co-workers, who have become a second family

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~Good health

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~All the good resources out there now for Christians

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~The opportunity to experience Women of Faith again - just in one more week!

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~All my new blogger friends

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~To be able to live in this awesome nation -where we are free to think for ourselves and go to church where and when we want with no threat of persecution

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~All the brave men and women fighting for this great nation of ours - putting their lives on the line day in and day out, so that we don't have to

Humbled

I just received a note to say that I had something from Dianne over at Glasses of Grace. So I headed over to her blog and this is what I found said about me and my blog:

Jess at Bittersweet: Another random find, besides Jill, that I just love. She finds great lessons in the ordinary things and right now has a great post about the change dishes you find beside registers in stores. I'll never see one of those again without thinking of her post on this....WOW!

How sweet is that! I am touched, flattered, honored, and encouraged to dig deeper and put my heart more fully back into my blog. To be quite honest, I'm surprised that anybody would be the least bit impressed with my blog in the past several months. As I have just been more or less 'out of touch'. Just coasting along. In the past, when I had a closer walk with God, words and ideas just seemed to 'strike' and pour forth. These days, not so much. Which makes it all the more evident that He is the One providing me the words on the more profound posts! Hopefully, with the added encouragement from sweet Dianne, I will be able to re-connect, not only with you all but with God once again.

Being as I'm not all that impressed with my latter posts, here are some I feel I had been guided on, in previous months:

We Could All Use a Little 'Change'

Frazzled

Single-Minded

Master Craftsman

Jesus, Take the Wheel

Life's in Pieces

Grateful Heart

Makin' a Splash


Okay... Now for the blogs I look most forward to reading each day!

http://www.glassesofgrace.blogspot.com/ Dianne just seems to be 'on the same page' as me SO many times! When I first read her blog, I just had to laugh because there were so many similarities in our thinking. :) And she has been my biggest supporter besides my family. Although we've never officially met, I consider her a dear friend whom I am very blessed to have found. Thank you, Dianne!

http://www.jodiyork.com/ Jodi - the very person who got me into blogging! Albeit by accident initially! :) Her blog is cute and funny at times, with stories of the kids and inspiring at other times. She's my sister and what can I say? I love her and I'm proud of her - as a sister, a friend and the mother she's been.

http://hendersonshighlights.blogspot.com/ Michelle is relatively new to the blog world, but a friend of mine for years now. I'm excited to share in this experience with her and thank her for her encouragement as well.

http://ohfiddle-dee-dee.blogspot.com/ Lyndy is a new visitor to my blog and she has had several posts that I have connected on over at her blog, just in the last several weeks. So, I look forward to more from her!

http://fiddledeedee.net/ I just recently discovered this blog through 'Inspired by Faith' and it is HILARIOUS!! A stay-at-home mother who just keeps it real and keeps you laughing.

My mind still can't comprehend all that the dear people involved with Virginia Tech are going through this week, even after watching the coverage all day yesterday. It's just not anything that you can really relate to, here in the United States... thank God. The tragedy surmounted any that have taken place before now and I think it could be safely said that this was a truly heinous act of a very troubled person. But, with all the hard feelings resulting from this troubling day, I challenge you. Heed the words in Luke 6:27-38. "...Love your enemies! ... Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Forgive others and you will be forgiven..." It's so easy to get caught up in the finger-pointing and imposing of hind-sight on those who "could've done something!" But, in all of this we're letting the hatred win. In Romans 12:21, we are reminded "Don't let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good."

I realize, it's easy for me to say... I don't have a loved one who was there that day. However, I think we could learn a lot from the 27 Amish gentlemen who attended the funeral of the man who assaulted and killed their innocent young girls.

And once again, I think of amazing Immaculee Ilibagiza... the survivor of the Rowandan Genocide whose family was slaughtered at the hands of her own neighbors and acquaintances. Overcome by thoughts of hate and overwhelming loss, she finally one night hit her knees and cried out "Forgive my evil thoughts, God. Please... as You always have, take this pain from me and cleanse my heart. Fill me with the power of Your love and forgiveness. Those who did these horrible things are still your children, so let me help them, and help me to forgive them. Oh, God, help me to love them."

You know, just months later, she returned back to her homeland, utterly destroyed by the genocide that took place and she actually found it in her (with the Lord's help) to face her family's seemingly heartless murderers. And instead of rage and anger... surprisingly, she found only pity and his undeniable sense of shame. When the time came, she "reached out, touched his hands lightly, and quietly said what she had come to say 'I forgive you'. Her heart eased immediately, and she saw the tension release from the captured killer..." Later, when questioned by the confused and obviously irritated soldier, “What was that all about? That was the man who murdered your family. I brought you to question… to spit on if you wanted to. But you forgave him! How could you do that? Why did you forgive him?” Immaculee simply answered with truth: “Forgiveness is all I have to offer.”

We may not understand. We may not want to forgive. But, in not doing so we are only fueling the hate and hurting ourselves. Sometimes, forgiveness may be the only thing we have to offer… but I think we owe it to ourselves not to let the evil win… and even to the child of God who, somehow, somewhere got so far off-track and consumed by evil, he just could not find his way back. The killer, in this case took his own life... but I think we still need to remember him and his family in our prayers along with the others who are suffering unfathomable loss tonight.

“Our Father,
Who art in Heaven
Hallowed be Thy name
Thy kingdom come
Thy will be done
On Earth as it is in Heaven
Give us this day
Our daily bread
And forgive us our trespasses
As we forgive those who trespass against us
And lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from evil.
For Thine is the kingdom
And the power
And the glory

Forever and Ever

Amen.”

If you'd like to send your prayers and condolences visit: http://rosa.hosting.vt.edu/index.php/memorial/

And I strongly encourage any and all to read, if they haven't "Left to Tell" by Immaculee Ilibagiza. Learn more about it at: www.lefttotell.com .

Planning for the Future

by: Mattie Stepanek

Heaven is a wonderful place

When a good-hearted person dies,

His or her spirit rises into Heaven.

And, Heaven is a forever place

That transcends our mortal

Sense of time and space.

There can be many different

Views on what Heaven is like,

Because Heaven is whatever

Makes each person

Eternally and fully happy.

To go to Heaven,

A person must be

Pure in heart, and truly sorry

For any sins committed.

If a person is not clean in heart

When he or she dies,

That person might have

To think and better prepare

For the eternal wonders of Heaven.

So, we should live each moment

Of life in a state of readiness,

And peaceful grace.

~April 3, 2000

In Jodi's blog today, she discussed how she can't begin to imagine how to die could be to gain? How, after all, could she ever manage not seeing the faces of her children... or any of those blessings of life we've come to love so deeply.

The above poem was penned by my beloved Mattie J.T. Stepanek when he was just 10 years old. And I'm sure many of you had caught him on either Oprah or Larry King or the like. If you had, you attest that he was the most profound spiritually inclined little boy you've ever had the chance to see. You could swear he was a 'fallen angel' himself... straight from the heavens above. Sent to inspire, encourage and somehow just let us in on a glimpse of all those uncertainties he was so sure of.

Mattie had a life of struggle. From beginning to end. Hospital visits all his life. Being hooked up to machines most of the time. Miserably uncomfortable more times than not. And had already lost two brothers and a sister by the age of 3. Two of which he never got to know personally, but still missed tremendously. And yet, he had the spirit of a champion. He still managed to find the good in life and by choice held onto that. Reading his words leaves you believing in more. And his poem that speaks most closely to my view on Heaven is this:

Innocent Visions

One time,

I saw Heaven.

And when I saw Heaven,

It was a girl.

And when I looked at the girl,

It looked like a boy.

And that is because

Heaven

Is everyone,

And everything,

And everywhere,

That is good and special.

~ October 21, 1993

He was just 3 years old when he wrote this poem. But that, to me, is what Heaven will be.

Those things you are blessed enough to experience here on Earth that you just can't seem to get enough of. The things (or people) that you love SO deeply and strongly that it almost aches to take it all in.

I tend to think of this whenever I see a breath-taking rainbow or a moon so bright at night it just takes your breath away. I find myself trying to take them in just as much as I can before they quickly fade into the sky.

Holding that toddler in your lap, while they dream. Feeling and breathing in fresh cool air...

Those, to me, are just some of the previews of what may lie ahead. And reminders that there are things much greater than the land we live in for our limited time here. Greater than our human minds could even fathom.

For more information on Mattie Stepanek: www.mattieonline.com

"Other things may change us,
but we start and end with family."

I see you now
As if it were yesterday
Standing at your door to greet us
Laughing and letting us in

I see you now
Sitting on your porch swing
Just chatting about the day before us
Or the times that lay behind

I see you now
Working on a Sunday dinner
Effortlessly preparing
A feast fit for a king

I see you now
Holding us tightly
As we head back for home
And you wave back from your door

I hear you now
Snickering and laughing
With the heart of a child
(With language that would leave
Any trucker or sailor blushing!)

I hear you now

Reading aloud

Every road sign passed

In at least 10 different ways :)

I hear you now

Singing with soul

The old classic country

And some songs hardly well-known

I feel you now

Hugging me close

Patting my butt

And saying "I love you, Dear"

I feel you now

Tugging at my heart

And whispering close

"I miss you, too, Sweetie"

And "I'll see you again!"

Happy Birthday, Grandma!!

They are precious in His sight.

Well, we had quite a scare this week...
After having noticed some new odd little purple marks showing up on Emery, here and there, Jodi took him to the pediatrician to see if there could be anything wrong. The doctor couldn't rule anything out, sent her to get bloodwork done, and said there was a real possibility of the marks being indicative of a serious condition such as leukemia... which left all of us just absolutely breathless. Especially, when the results came back, showing that his platelets were extremely low.
Finally, after a long two days, he had the second round of blood tests done today, and to the relief of us all, his blood platelet count had started climbing back up... not quite back to normal yet, but headed in the right direction. And his red and white blood cells stayed in the normal range. Which is what we had been praying for.
Evidently, it was some sort of virus and that was just how his little body responded to it. He goes back in January for a check-up, so hopefully by then, he'll be COMPLETELY back to normal.

Kudos to the little guy though... he didn't even cry when they drew his blood ~ which is more than I can say for myself!!!

* We love you, Slobber Boy!!! *

"Sometimes all you can do... is bow your head and pray!" (another great card brought to you by Leanin' Tree)
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You know, sometimes I think it's easy to forget just what a 'fight' the "good fight of faith" can be. And here lately, I have felt the heavy, persistent blows to the beliefs of my inner core. Having seen "Cinderella" quite a bit in the last year or so, I can't help but relate to her getting knocked down one too many times and finally just running out to the courtyard saying "I can't believe anymore. I just can't. There's nothing left to believe in." So many times, it just feels like you try and you try and you try... and you do good, until you just get knocked down one too many times or just simply tire out. It's then that you just lose all your resolve. And it seems the harder you try, the harder the fall when all the chips come crashing down.

Today, I was made aware of all of this even more than ever, as I just had to take it all to the literal level. Already getting off to a bad day, not feeling well - emotionally, physically, mentally... I pressed on, continuing through the routine. And even though the cat threw up on my bedroom carpet... again... I didn't let it get to me and just continued on... I was actually doing good on time (for once) and left the apartment feeling a little better. I had it all together. Had some nice new clothes on (finally). Doing good on time. Had my trash all sacked up, ready to go. Water in hand. I got to the end of the sidewalk, right by my car and I just took a header to the pavement. And having fallen off of the risen sidewalk, I didn't just stumble... I CRASHED. Water and ice everywhere. New pants (first time wearing them) not just scratched up a bit... but rather RIPPED clear across the knee. My knee, now asphalt-imbedded, gushing blood. Lovely. And clearly the straw that broke the camel's back this morning. But yet, very determined by this point, I pressed on.
Now LATE for work, I rushed to clean my lovely new abrasion, searched out a pair of OLD pants that might match the top I'd already picked out for the day, quickly ironed those and got myself together a fresh cup of water. I no sooner got all settled into the car and turned on the cd player to hear Jeremy Camp singing "Understand"... and I just had to smile. (As much as I love his music, I never realized how many songs he has about falling down!!) :) Gotta love it.
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"Understand" by Jeremy Camp

Every time I fall down on my face
I see the One Who bore all my shame
To know that you are everything I need You to be
You're my ever present help in time of need

I know You understand it all
So, why don't I get back on my feet again

Every pain I feel inside my heart
It takes a faith I know I can't depart
To know that You hear every cry I raise to You
Bringing thoughts of hope the words I bring I know are few

I know You understand it all
So, why don't I get back on my feet again

You hear me when I call
You're there when I fall
You hear me when I call

I know You understand it all
So, why don't I get back on my feet again

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Tim McGraw had a good song a while back that comes to mind as well... "We Carry On":

When our lives come undone...
We carry on
Cause there's promise in the morning sun
We carry on
As the dark surrenders to the dawn
We were born to overcome
We carry on


I guess that’s all we can do – so we might as well carry on in good faith – with the hopes that tomorrow will be better!!!

*Don't even ask what all it entailed to get this blog entry published!!! Let's just say, in trying to do so... this day has come full circle. And now, I've had enough... I'm going to bed!*

Good Problems to Have

Mom was trying to select a good picture of herself for her up and coming magazine debut... but had a slight problem. Every good picture of her showed dad's hand on her shoulder and would consequently show up in the photo. And I couldn't help but think, 'Now, that's a good problem to have.'

So, I've set out to find some of my own 'Good Problems'...


~ I've got 3 overflowing bags full of clothes and shoes that I need to unload, because I have too many new ones to replace them with.

~ My car is in DIRE need of a cleaning and detailing, because of my Mondays with Savannah (she tends to leave a trail of teeny tiny hair bands and candy wrappers).

~ I can't sleep in when Savannah sleeps over, because she starts climbing on my face around about 6:00 am (going something like this...)

"It's time to get up, Jess... It's on the 7" (This starts at around 5:47.)
"Wrong 7... Try again."
"C'mon... It's time to get up, Aunt Jess! Look! The SUN'S UP!"
"No, it's not... That's just the moon."
"Nu-ugh... (giggling) Then, why are the kids out, getting the bus?"
"I don't know... What are they thinking?" :)
"Yeah... (grinning) What are they thinking?"

~ I really need to start thinking about Christmas gifts now, because I have so many special people in my life.

~ I can't decide which book to read next, because I have SO MANY good ones to choose from!

~ I've got to change over my closet, because FALL IS FINALLY BACK, BABY!!! :)

"Oh, Thou, who has given us so much, mercifully grant us one more thing ~ a grateful heart." (George Herbert)

~Music is my biggest passion. Many of you know that. So, if you will just indulge me here, in posting another song in my blog. But, it's a song I just recently discovered by Nichole Nordeman and it has really hit home to me this weekend... just in how I've been feeling, what I've been 'up against' and it portrays the perspective I'd love to maintain in my life.~


"Gratitude" (by Nichole Nordeman)

Send some rain, would You send some rain?
‘Cause the earth is dry and needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade
Would You send a cloud, thunder long and loud?
Let the sky grow black and send some mercy down
Surely You can see that we are thirsty and afraid
But, maybe not today
Maybe You’ll provide in other ways
And if that’s the case…

We’ll give thanks to You with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If you never send us rain

Daily bread, give us daily bread
Bless our bodies, keep our children fed
Fill our cups, then fill them up again tonight
Wrap us up
And warm us through
Tucked away beneath our sturdy roofs
Let us slumber safe from danger’s view this time
Or maybe not, not today
Maybe You’ll provide in other ways
And if that’s the case…



We’ll give thanks to You with gratitude
A lesson learned to hunger after You
That a starry sky offers a better view if no roof is overhead
And if we never taste that bread

Oh, the differences that often are between
Everything we want and what we really need

So, grant us peace, Jesus grant us peace
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight
Or, maybe not, not today
Peace might be another world away
And if that’s the case…

We’ll give thanks to you with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You
That we are truly blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need
And if You never grant us peace

But, Jesus, would You please…

~You know, sometimes we are just simply let down, or brought down by ourselves, by others, our circumstances (either changing or unchanging), expectations... but I have found that even in such times, if you turn to God, even when your requests seem to fall on 'deaf ears', He always finds a way to shine through for you, many times when you least expect it. It's just up to us, to look for Him and listen for Him and accept the reality of Him all around us... until He leads us back out of the valley and once again onto the path upon which we know we belong.~

"God grant us the patience
to change the men we can,
the aim to shoot the men we can't,
and the wisdom to know the difference."

We got this greeting card in at the shop a few months ago... I had picked it out, thinking it was funny and it reminded me of Great Aunt Tickie. I never sent it to her, but always get a chuckle out of it, whenever I see it and think of her.

We lost Tickie about a week ago now, and though we never had much opportunity to spend time with her (her being in Longview, Texas and not able to travel all that well herself) we will all feel a void for some time. There have been many of my older relatives, I've wished we'd lived closer to, and she is no exception.

Full of stories, ready to share... I could listen to her for hours. She was alive in the early 1900s. Raised in rural Arkansas. Forget life without microwaves, they had life before refrigerators!! She was one of three girls raised by their 'Papa' and grandmother, after their parents divorced. She herself had married and divorced, at least three (?) times... twice to the same man (I believe he was the alpha and omega). And we hadn't heard until just several years ago, that she had shot at an ex-husband who threatened to come back and get some things from the house.

She overcame a lot in her life, but it was not always easy. She cared for their Papa once he was placed in a nursing home. She lost one younger sister suddenly at a very young age (she believed her to be shot by her own husband while overseas). And the other younger sister (my grandmother) very slowly over the last 12 years to Alzheimer's. Both quite tragic and heartbreaking in their own right.

In recent years, she could hardly support herself and often fell, breaking bones and spirit. But, you never heard her complain. She was a very strong woman, in every way. Overcoming any challenges life may have thrown at her. She was a great cook; could prepare enough food for the army to feast on at any given time. She did her best to answer any correspondence that ever came her way. And, as I said before, could tell stories for hours about life as it'd been through her eyes.

We love Aunt Tickie and we'll miss her terribly. For the amazing person she was and the link she'd been since losing Grandma Mary. But, maybe now, they can be together again and enjoy each other's company for eternity (if arguing is allowed in heaven... as I can't imagine them as happy any other way). :)

Tough week for the community...

Well, after such a tragedy last Wednesday, we learned Sunday morning that the 5-year old daughter of a prominent family in our church passed away during the night. Evidently, she'd only had a mild cough and yet ended up aspirating and not making it to morning. So, now, along with the Casola Family, please keep the Malcoms in your thoughts and prayers in their losing little Mary Beth.

Time is so precious, especially with the little ones, who bring so much to our lives and change so quickly! That's why I was glad, as usual, to have Savannah down for a 'slumber party' this weekend. Just some quality 'girl time', eating yogurt and fruit 'floor picnic'-style, watching (and now dancing with!) princess movies and baking cinnamon rolls for breakfast. Thank you, Miss Savannah! I had a Ball with you. (Now, if we could JUST get you to sleep until at least 7:00!!) :) Love you.

Grace under Pressure:

I was in just as much shock as most everyone else, as the local news came in... reporting of a sweet innocent family being randomly, maliciously run down (repeatedly!) after an otherwise pleasant lunch together at McDonald's with the kids. A good, Christian family who have done SO much in the community to be sure to help others... now losing a precious 2-year old little girl, in such an unimaginable, horrid way. The human heart just can't even begin to reason it out. Where was God when all of this took place? How could He just idly 'sit by' and watch on as such tragedy unfolded in the lives of such devout followers? But, it's not for us to figure out... just for us to trust and believe that He is there, and will give this family the strength and resilience they will need to help Him turn even this tragedy for good, as He has promised to do in our lives.

Paul Casola states: "Please continue to pray for our family as we continue life without Avery and moving forward. Pray also for my wife and children. It’s our responsibility to honor God, glorify Jesus, find a way to forgive and move forward. That’s the responsibility of me and my family.”

With it being a couple of sisters, in their 30's, just simply grabbing lunch with a few 'little ones'... I just keep thinking, 'what if it'd been me and my sister and her 'little ones'? I can't even begin to imagine. My heart definitely goes out to them, and am all the more appreciative of the time I get with my loved ones.

Re-committing...

Tonight was our last Wednesday night service at Eastridge, for the summer. We won't meet back for '863' until August, which I hate, because I have really enjoyed the services, with Gary speaking and Shane leading worship. But, I know they need time to recoup with their families and regroup for the fall.
So, Gary ended tonight, by speaking on 're-committing', to get us through the summer break, as a whole. And, I just feel that after all that God has helped me with this last year, now would be a good time for me to re-commit somewhat publicly, as a way of acknowlegment for all He's done in my life.

"As for me, I will serve the Lord. I will love You with all of my heart, soul, mind, and strength. I will turn away from every thought, desire, action, and relationship that keeps me from following You closely and will stop any willful pattern of sin. I, again, place in Your hands, my life here on earth, my forgiveness, and my hope for eternity with You. I thank You for sacrificing Your Son on the cross in order for us to have this relationship with You. " Amen.